


What It Takes To Heal

by The_Tevinter_Biscuit



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Healing, M/M, Recovery, Religious Undertones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-23 15:11:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9662948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Tevinter_Biscuit/pseuds/The_Tevinter_Biscuit
Summary: Moving on since the accident has been hard for Fenris. Luckily, Sebastian is there to pick up the pieces. Perhaps he could even fall in love.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Sebris is my second love after fenhawke, so, here we are...
> 
> loosely based off this art I did; http://the-tevinter-biscuit.tumblr.com/post/157110540206/self-indulgent-sebris
> 
> Enjoy!

Upon catching him sprawled on the sofa, chest rising and falling with the rhythm of his breathing, a sigh of relief escaped him. In this moment, he looked so peaceful. The bags under his eyes were as heavy as ever, a dark dusting of purple under his closed eyes. It had been so long since he’d seen him sleeping. He pretended caffeine chased away his rest through cups of coffee and not the haunting of memories.

Light blue blanket in hand, Sebastian carefully placed it over Fenris’s sleeping body. It would be too risky to carry him a bed where he could rest more comfortably. The last thing he wanted to do was disturb him, not when he needed the sleep so badly.

A smile crossed his lips when he saw Fenris’s fists curl into the material and fidget to bring it close to him. Tenderly, he ran his fingers through his hair, brushing it back and tucking it behind his ear. He took a seat beside him, still brushing through locks of white gently as to not wake him. The gesture calmed some of his tense muscles and for that he was grateful.

Across from him on the coffee table, he could see a bottle of pills. He reached over to inspect them. Within moments he worked out that they were sleeping pills. It was no wonder he was so fast asleep, by the looks of things he’d really knocked himself out with them. A part of him was sad that Fenris had resorted to this, that there was no way for him to get sleep without them. The other part was thankful that he had realised there was something wrong and if he needed a little push to stay as healthy as he could, then so be it.

The last few years had been rough. He’d offered Fenris a place in his home where he stayed alone when the accident happened. Fenris had been struggling to stay in the home he had built with now deceased husband, Hawke. Every scent, every souvenir upon the mantelpiece, even the very atmosphere of the eerily empty house was too much. It was just going to be a temporary arrangement, Fenris telling him that he didn’t want to intrude on his life. Sebastian had only shaken his head and told him it was no trouble, he was his best friend after all.

However, it turned out to not be so temporary. More and more of Fenris’s things got moved into Sebastian’s house and even though pretty much everything of his resided there for the past year, they hadn’t made the big move. Fenris was unsure what he wanted to do with his and Hawke’s home. He wasn’t sure if he could ever move back in.

There was no denying that for a time he’d had a crush on Fenris. It was amazing to him that there were people that didn’t fall in love with him the moment they saw him. Even now as he built back up to a healthy weight and the restless circles under his stunning green eyes weren’t so easily remedied, he was beautiful. Soft white hair framed his face, his dark olive skin was in no way blemished by the white patches that could be spotted encircling his arms and face.

He’d have to be an awful person to try and pursue a recent widower. For as much as he consumed his dreams with the dorky dimples that came out when he smiled, they were better left as dreams. He was a friend to Fenris and he was content with it staying that way. Through it all, he just wanted to be there for him.

So, he pried him away when Fenris pressed their lips together. He was desperate for affection, for something to fill the aching gap that Hawke’s death had left behind. Sebastian had no intention of being a rebound, for causing Fenris more suffering was the last thing he wanted to do no matter how much he longed for his embrace.

Instead, he calmed him down. He let him cry until his eyes were red and his throat sore; he let him apologise and tire himself out. Sebastian rubbed his shoulders and told him not to worry, he made a cup of hot chocolate and they curled under a blanket together.

It was only right, Fenris had done so much for him when he lost his family. Comforted him, distracted him from the pain as best he could even if he couldn’t understand. It wasn’t perfect, there were times he got frustrated with him, yelled at him and told him things he didn’t deserve to hear. Fenris didn’t let it sway him. He took it in stride and didn’t give in. For all his efforts, the least he could do was be there for him now in this dark time.

Sebastian couldn’t help but wonder if anything more would ever come. One day in the future, Fenris would move on. He wanted to help him let go but not forget, especially not with bottle upon bottle of wine. He was much too young to throw the idea of dating again out of the window. It would be a shame if he never loved again. He didn’t care who captured him, so long as someone did and he could be happy once again.

Perhaps he should’ve expected it to be him in hindsight. He’d wiped his tears and cleaned up his vomit when he overdid it with the alcohol. Most importantly, he was the one who never gave up on him.

He couldn’t help but think it was an odd thought when he’d spent so long watching him and Hawke dance around each other. Flirting, laughter, bashful smiles and kisses. They were the closest thing to soulmates he’d ever witnessed. For a couple that seemed so perfect, it was a mystery as to why God would take them away from each other. There had been many times in his life he’d questioned his faith. He wondered why God would let such an awful thing happen to his family, and why Hawke would be taken from Fenris.

Everything happened for a reason, he told himself, that this had to be God’s plan. It seemed so hard to grasp when there was so much unfair suffering and trauma.

God had brought them together. Through the waves of tears, pain, and loss, they had been united. Everything was to be taken at the pace Fenris chose. He would never dream of pushing him into something he wasn’t comfortable with. For the most part, they were content with the cuddling and gentle hold they had on each other. It was worth it, for moments like these where Fenris shuffled to rest his head upon Sebastian’s lap while he was still curled in the blanket.

To be loved by Fenris was a gift in its own right. Hawke had been a lucky man while he lived. He’d felt his touch, the feel of his chapped lips upon his, and the way he stared with such longing. Sebastian did not feel worthy of it being his now. What mattered most was that he was happy. Whatever he chose, so long as he was content.

A little later, Fenris stirred in his sleep. His eyes fluttered open, hands reaching up to rub at them as he focused on his surroundings. He turned to look up at Sebastian, a flush covering his cheeks when he noticed he had been laying on him. Sebastian met his gaze, smiling at him and unlacing his fingers from his hair so he could shift to sit up. The blanket pooled at his lap when he did.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. He ran his own thin fingers through his hair now, dishevelling it after Sebastian had so carefully brushed through it. Sebastian shook his head.

“Don’t apologise. I’m glad you got some rest,” Sebastian replied. “If you’re still tired, you can go upstairs,”

Fenris pondered it. He seemed hesitant. It took a soft kiss on the cheek and Sebastian’s gentle whisper to convince him; “Come on, let’s go.”

Their footsteps as they padded up the staircase echoed in the house. Sebastian took Fenris’s hand in his and guided him to the bed. It was an innocent gesture, one that Fenris appreciated greatly. Together, they laid upon the sheets and melted into the comfort it offered. When Fenris slung his arm around him, he couldn’t help but wrap his own arms around him and hold him close to his chest. His smile widened when he saw him close his eyes.

This was the most Fenris had slept in a very long time. If he could bring him this, it was enough. In fact, seeing him sleep was even bringing a bit of tiredness to his own eyes. Gradually, he found himself also falling into a blissful slumber beside him.

Healing was a long, treacherous path but together, they could face anything.


End file.
